Step By Step Guide To Stop Self Doubt

So many people romanticize their ideas, plans, goals, and dreams; but when it comes time to actually put them into action, they get paralyzed with doubt and start second guessing themselves. One of the most common signs of doubt is procrastination and perfectionism. Yes, that is a symptom of self doubt, and today we are going to talk about how to break those habits and stop self doubt.

First off, we have to identify that self doubt is a result of either fear or a lack of self confidence. So, in order to stop self doubt we have to learn how to overcome fear and how to build confidence and self esteem. So here it goes.

How to get over fear. Well, there are lots of ways to get over your fear just as there are lots of reasons (or things) that you may be fearing. But, for the purposes of this topic today, I am going to stick with the thing that everyone can do to get over fears and that is JUST DO IT. Whatever it is that you are doubting, second guessing, or hesitating to do - Just do it! That's it. There is no magic to getting over your fears. You just have to face them and DO the thing that you’re afraid of. If you are afraid of heights, you have to go to the top of a tall building and experience the height. If you are afraid of dogs, you have to put yourself in the same room with the dog and experience being in the presence of the dog. If you are afraid of failure, you have to keep going and pushing yourself instead of succumbing to the excuses you make to give you the validation you need to quit. Getting over your fear is a psychological thing because fears exist in your mind. So, to get over a fear, you need to find the courage to look that fear in the eye and push through it!

Next, how to build your confidence. Again, I am cutting to the chase in this blog today. No fluff and straight to the point. So, how do you build your confidence strong enough to stop self doubt? Well, you build your confidence in the same way that you get over your fears and that’s by doing the thing that you lack confidence about. Confusing? Yeah, a little. So, let me put it into real life terms. Let’s just say you lack confidence in your ability to cook, you just have to cook. Even if your food is not good when you first start, do it anyway. Keep practicing and learn more about your craft as you go. With each meal you’ll get better, the food will taste better, and as it gets better your confidence will increase. Here’s another example - if you lack confidence when recording a video or being on camera, you have to just do it! Just turn the camera on and start recording yourself. When you record the first few videos, you’ll probably feel like you didn’t do a good job and you’ll find 10,000 errors in it. That's the lack of confidence and the self critiquing setting in, but ignore it and keep going. Record a video once a day (or once a week at bare minimum). Practice, practice, practice. Watch some youtube videos to learn how to make good videos and get some best practices and tips. Then, just keep practicing. With each video you’ll get better and as you see yourself getting better, your confidence will increase.

The problem that most of you face which leads to your lack of confidence is that you compare yourself, your ability, and your skills with people who are already good and successful with what you are aspiring to do. You expect to start and be able to perform at an expert level. You have to keep in mind that the people who you see doing what you want to do successfully were once right where you are - unsure, riddled with self doubt, and lacking confidence. But, they are able to exude such confidence and be super successful today because they found the courage to start and stay consistent even when they weren’t good. They were willing to be vulnerable and imperfect in front of the world long enough to get better. And that’s what you need to do!

Overcoming fear and increasing confidence is the key to stop doubting yourself, to stop second guessing your ability, to stop worrying about what other people are going to think or say, to stop hesitating, and to stop trying to make it perfect before you start. The bottom line, you have to find the courage to JUST DO IT! And once you start doing it, increase your knowledge and skills with it. Then keep doing it. Keep practicing. Keep getting better. If you remain consistent, over a short period of time, you’ll notice yourself getting better (trust me, it doesn’t take long to improve). Soon after your swag will change. You’ll start speaking and behaving more confidently and then others will start to take notice. People will become interested in who you are and what you do. Before you know it, the self doubt will have fallen away. You probably won’t even notice when it happens. And when the energy that you emanate into the world reaches this level, it ain’t shit that can stop you.

So go ahead, Sis. Just do it. In order to stop self doubt, you have to take action. And you have to take immediate action. Don’t think about it. Just do it.

Come back and let me know how it goes. Can’t wait to celebrate your overcoming season with you!

Love ya Queen!

Breezy Phoenix